Remembering Love

Today is the day I sum up seven wonderful weeks here in Brazil. I came here for several reasons. First, I wanted to celebrate the book I released in May last year—my autobiography, Lost Souls’ Paradise, which tells the story of the darkest time in my life, when my spiritual search led me astray into codependency and eventually into a cult. At the same time, I wanted to mark the end of a major cycle in my life—a period where I have finally healed from that time in the cult and broken free from patterns I have carried with me since childhood. When SVT produced the three-part documentary, Holy Fuck, where both my husband and I shared our stories, it became the defining moment—the moment we fully opened up, a necessary step before we could say goodbye to the past and step into something completely new.

Now, seven weeks later, I find myself, once again, sitting on my balcony overlooking the ocean, grounding myself in everything this journey has given me. It has been such a clear ending, but just as clearly, the beginning of a new life cycle. How long this one will last, I don’t know, but I can feel with certainty that it begins right now—with a sense of hope, transformation, and a new kind of freedom.

During this journey, I have rediscovered that, in the end, love is what matters most. My husband and I have gone through a deep and incredibly transformative relationship journey over the past eleven years. We made the conscious decision early on to practice love, and after a while, we realized we wanted to help others do the same. That’s why we trained as relationship coaches and started Training for Love. We used to joke that if we could break free from our sometimes absurd and dysfunctional patterns, then anyone could—because we truly felt like hopeless cases at times! 😊

We have shared our tools in countless ways—through coaching sessions, retreats, workshops, lectures, training programs, and interviews. But here in Brazil, I’ve come to realize that all these tools, as valuable as they are, are just aids. Love must come first. And I’m not talking about the romanticized version of love we see in Hollywood movies or grow up believing in—I mean that deeper, healing love that our masters and prophets have spoken about throughout history. The kind of love that doesn’t intoxicate us but instead heals us and helps us come home to who we truly are, reminding us that we are part of something greater than ourselves. It’s the love our hearts long for, yet so few know how to manifest and live. To be in a loving relationship, we first need to come home to ourselves—there are no shortcuts. True love can never be faked; when we are in love, we know it. We remember.

We humans tend to call many things love—attraction, codependency, control, jealousy, even fear sometimes wears the name of love. This is one of the first realizations we must have if we truly want to create more love in our lives. What do we believe is love, but actually isn’t? Without that awareness, every tool we learn will only become a means to get what we want, rather than a way to give.

We need to make that shift to remember that love is something we always have access to. It is always here. It is we who turn away from it and then try to get it from another person. And when that doesn’t happen, we blame them, as if they were responsible for the love in our lives.

Tomorrow, it’s time to return to Sweden, and I am reminded of how important it is to step away, to gain new perspectives, to remember and see things that have always been there. Distance somehow makes it easier to recognize what truly matters. Brazil has given me exactly what I needed—a reminder of love, of freedom, and of the fact that life always moves forward. And now, it’s time to bring all of that home.

With Love Beatrice